Tuesday, September 23, 2014

IncrEDulous

Keeping to our gratuitous Friends theme, today's Movie Minute is the classic ED from 1996. We'll be dancing around that stupid fountain forever!!!!!

"Come on, ladies. Let's see those nips. COME ON"

And then we'll get chimp AIDS! Heeaauuyyyagggh!!!

"Up high, buddy. And then... down low."

Ed is a horrifying allegory for Jackie Robinson. On top of that, Ed is named after Ed Wood who apparently wrote this monkey poop.  

"Okay, when he rounds second base, let the feces fly, Ed!"

Ed has a non-consensual proto-consanguineous relationship with Matt LeBlanc, freshly fired from Friends. This movie is so bad it almost makes you forget JOEY. (No.)

 "All right, break out the EPT and start crying...."

Together they form a bond consisting of fart jokes, gas jokes, and fart jokes.

 Nick Nolte, everyone!

Turns out that the delightful chimp can sure play a mean pinball. Alas, it's baseball skills that are wanted.

"My ERA is great. My AIDS is even better!"

Ed helps a down-on-their-luck baseball team win the sub-regional quarterfinal invitational preliminary exhibition series. We all stand and cheer!!

"This trophy-turd is super dried out. But otherwise, thanks!"

After all the fussin' and feces-flingin', the movie ends on a sad note when LeBlanc has to take Ed on a very special trip to the vet.

"One last pee in the toilet, buddy, and then we have to go.
Then we have to *choke* go...."

Fun Fact: A chimp was harmed in the making of this film. And often!

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