Bling Ding-a-ling

In the BLING RING we profoundly analyze our obsession with celebrity culture and how fresh this idea is. So, so fresh. We witness beautiful young people buy coffee.

"Oops! Did I just kick some gross homeless guy in the head? Oh well!"

They march to and fro. Fro and to and fro. Buying coffee. Coffee is great!

"See how we're making a comment? A comment?! A COMMENT?!?!"

Sometimes they wear their sunglasses on their heads.

 "Why oh why did I let Harry put his wand in me??"

And they put on lipstick.

"It was about this size...."

And sometimes they wear their sunglasses while putting on lipstick, while thinking about getting coffee.

"I had assumed he was gay. And then it just... happened."

They take selfies. Because they are ever so interesting.

"I'll never forget this moment."

They go to Paris Hilton's grand mansion and are frightened by how she lives in a giant inset circle. And yet she still looks fabulous!

"Who wants to punch me in the face?"

Then they all get arrested. WHA???? So you see we learned something about celebrity and fashion and hair and makeup and shoes and purses. And jewelry. And little combs.

In the end, I point the finger at YOU, the idiot American public, for letting this movie happen. Most of all, I blame Rodney King. Why can't he be around to distract the cops so the beautiful people can be left alone?

"Wait, is that my agent over there?! I'm gonna KILL him."

Actually, no. I'm the idiot. Watching this movie forced me to reassess my life. And I conclude that I am the idiot. A big, big, bling-a-ding-dong idiot.

Well played, Sophia. Well played.